Last Tuesday (10/17), we were so excited when we checked our voice-mail messages to find out that our Case-Manager had called and that she had some news for us. When we called her back, thinking that it was going to finally be "THE CALL" we had so anxiously been waiting for: the "OFFICIAL MATCH" & "TRAVEL DATE", we were only terribly disappointed to find out that Colombia was now requiring more paper-work from us! Although our original Psychological Evaluation had been wonderfully positive and glowing and we were highly recommended by the Dr., the Colombian ICBF (the Human Services Dept. in charge of our adoption process), was now requiring some additional psychological tests to make sure we (a couple who never had kids before) were indeed going to be suitable and ready to adopt a sibling group of 3 older children???
As much as we respect the validity of their concerns and the fact that Colombia is known to be one of the countries that truly cares for the welfare of the children they place, the truth is that we did not go into this process blindly, being led only by the emotional aspect of dreaming of those 3 adorable little faces that we found on a "waiting list" and thinking that the whole experience would just be a "perfect honeymoon." Not only have we been fully preparing ourselves for the possible baggage that may accompany (at least initially), the "older children adoption," we felt quite competent due to our solid 18 year marriage, our maturity in years, also due to the professional education, training and reading of many recommended therapeutic books and the valuable experience Sharon has been fortunate enough to have of working for over 5 years in the mental health field specifically, in a residential treatment program for children and adolescents who had been severely abused and neglected!
CAN ANYONE SAY: "CRY-BABY"???
OK, OK we'll admit that maybe we are feeling just a wee bit sorry for ourselves and the stress of "WAITING" had gotten to us a little, still we are only human and felt quite sad that not only in life we have been dealt the unfortunate gift of "infertility", but now when we are fully ready to pour out our hearts in love for those we've waited for all these years and have chosen to be our future children, we are somewhat unfairly being penalized for the fact that we never had kids before - go figure???
Anyway, we decided that no matter what the ICBF's final decision will be, we wanted to always have 100% peace of mind that we did absolutely ALL that was asked of us, so we tracked down the Psychologist personal cell phone number, found her on vacation down south and she was so wonderful and willing to help us out, even going into the office on the weekend to find and schedule the new tests Colombia was requiring. We went ahead for more testing this past Monday. The Doc was so kind and understanding, even sharing with us how absurd and unnecessary she thought this new request and subsequent delays were The most interesting of all (we have to just have a sense of humor and laugh), is that one of the new tests the ICBF was requiring us to take (to possibly base their final decision on), was published in 1967 (yeap, almost 40 years ago) and it hasn't been used by Psychologists in years, due to the fact that it was so archaic and flawed that it was replaced by a more accurate version many years ago! Oh well!!!
We received the completed and notarized report from the Psychologist yesterday and it was soooooooooooo good that you'd think she was describing "Jesus" himself!!! :>)
Between us, Michael and I could barely recognize the people described on that new glowing report, but it was sooooooooooo good WE EVEN WANT TO BE ADOPTED BY THAT COUPLE!!!! :>)
OK now, in all seriousness, by faith we are going to be grateful for the growth we are already experiencing in this whole process, for even though we knew from day one that Colombia is kind of "picky" and that in international adoption one has to always remember to be flexible, we never thought that this process was going to keep dragging and have soooooooooo many last minute "surprises". We are still 100% fully committed in our hearts to adopt these precious children, but know that the end result is 100% out of our control, so we will just continue to wait and see what will happen next. The one thing that we have been reminded of this week, is that all along we have been praying for the Lord's PERFECT will, not just for us, but most importantly for the girls, it should never be about us "getting 3 daughters" but about them finally "Getting the right parents" who will love them, help them heal and become the amazing human beings with all the potential God in His awesome love and mercy, created them to become!!!
Therefore, if God's will is what we TRULY have been praying for, we need to be prepared for WHATEVER answer He may have for us and allow our hearts to be filled with gratitude for His answer, for no matter what that may be, it will certainly be the RIGHT and PERFECT answer!!!
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